Your 2013 Style Zodiac
With the new year inevitably comes ambitious style resolutions, but have you considered how your astrological sign affects your wardrobe choices? Whether you believe in these symbols or use that section of the newspaper for kindling along with the forgotten fruit cake in the back of the fridge, we’ve broken down each zodiac sign by character traits and included a corresponding piece of sartorial advice (Go-to-hell pants are not mentioned but inherently included for every sign).
March 21 to April 19
You’re used to leading the pack, and staying ahead of trends is not only a option but a personal requirement. Which is why you will embrace winter whites and give others the emotional strength to clad themselves in white corduroy trousers.
April 20 to May 20
We know you’re stubborn but it’s time you learned how to tie a bow tie and wear it well. In fact, you will sport it with such grace and aplomb the great men’s clothier will retweet you when you participate in Bow Tie Friday. Now go forth and make your mark in 140 characters or less.
May 21 to June 20
Okay Shaggy, we appreciate your fun-spirited Movember participation but it’s time to let go of those lumberjack locks in favor of proper grooming. This year you will get a haircut every four weeks not because you necessarily need it, but because you respect yourself. As Glenn O’Brien says, “Upon awakening, a man should prepare himself for greatness and hold that pose until retiring.” If your coif aspires to greatness the rest will follow suit.
June 21 to July 22
Here’s what is going to happen, you’re going to use your creative intuition to work a jacket into your every day ensemble. Regardless of the weather, pick a suit jacket or sport coat that will complement your trousers or dare we say, denim. It’s a foolproof style upgrade that everyone from your boss to Mother will appreciate.
July 23 to August 22
You read the style magazines, pay attention to trends and are a proud member of #TeamORG. Now that you’ve mastered the rules it’s time to edit your closet and either toss or tailor anything that doesn’t fit you perfectly. Because let’s face it Simba, one day everything the light touches will be yours and being in charge means looking the part.
August 23 to September 22
They say a lady always notices your shoes first, and it’s time to take stock in them. Graduate from tennis shoes to wing tips, or invest in an array of penny loafers or double monks. Quality shoes will last you for years, and the natural critic in you will discern the solid investments from passing fancies. By the way, when’s the last time you visited a cobbler, anyway?
September 23 to October 22
Channel your inner Southern dandy this year and invest in a seersucker suit. What better way to spend a summer afternoon than indulging your inner socialite by drinking mint juleps and making idle chatter with ladies in dresses? They’ll appreciate your classic style as much as you enjoy the barbecue fare.
October 23 to November 22
We know you’re a loyal chap and quite devoted to your trusty blue shirt. This year you will stretch yourself to thinking outside kinds of blue and opt for checks, plaids or a pink oxford. It may be difficult at first, but remember the hardest and right thing are nearly always the same.
November 22 to December 21
Congratulations on mastering the art of the blazer. Now let’s concentrate on filling its pocket. From pocket squares to sunglasses to driving gloves or even bow ties, this often overlooked detail adds character to your signature, outspoken style.
December 22 to January 19
For the man who accepts nothing less than instant gratification, we urge you to make any outfit memorable with an ample dose of “go-to-hell ankles“. It’s not only a brazen display of masculinity, but gives the ladies something to look at.
January 20 to February 18
You younger Aquarius’ may think you know everything, but when you’re out at Dorrian’s please try to tuck in your shirt and leave the backwards baseball cap for the bleachers. By merely tucking and belting in your button down you immediately become more presentable. And while we’re on the subject, just because it’s on special doesn’t mean you should present a lady with a canned drink.
February 19 to March 20
Repeat after us: you are now not the guy who just takes off his tie to hit the town after work. You had a long day and it shows. Keep a spare shirt Don Draper style in your office so you’re not mistaken as an intern while ordering your 11th hour mozzarella sticks at Big D’s. (If you couldn’t tell, we do frequent Dorrian’s.)
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